in other news, Michael Jackson died; i don’t give a shit.

hey so Micheal Jackson died.  and i felt the most shocking thing about this was that my boyfriend knew before i did by texting me “MJ died” my first thought was “Michael Jordan or Jackson?” and my second thought was “what are you too good to spell out someones full name? what an asshole”

I BELIEVE I CAN FLY, I BELIEVE I CAN TOUCH THE SKY. I LOVE YOU MJ!

I BELIEVE I CAN FLY, I BELIEVE I CAN TOUCH THE SKY. I LOVE YOU MJ!

but after that me and the friend i was with decided to send out mass texts to everyone we knew to announce this and the best reaction received was “I have no reason to live anymore”  then we watched the entire first season of true blood and i totally forgot about him dying. until today when i realized every single fucking news outlet is talking about this and how amazing he was and they’re doing tribute videos for him. man, fuck that.

when he was alive all you jerk offs hated him for the remaining 10 years of his life. so then he dies and the same people that dubbed him “wacko jacko” are crying about how amazing he was. you assholes. you fucking assholes. he was bat-shit insane and if he didn’t molest children he damn sure bought all the rights to the Beatles songs out from under Paul McCartney. so I’m going to say it. Micheal Jackson was a fucking lunatic. Paul McCartney is a saint you douche-bag, you should have let him have his songs you piece of garbage. he should have NEVER done that duet with you!

how could you do that to such a handsome british man? HOW? HE WAS IN WINGS!!

how could you do that to such a handsome british man? HOW? HE WAS IN WINGS!!

there. it feels so good to have that out. now, don’t get me wrong. i fucking love thriller but when i listen to it from now on I’m going to think “fuck, i wish Vincent Price was still alive so he could say awesome ghoulish things” not “fuck, i wish Michael Jackson was still alive since he was such a beacon of hope for all of us” might i remind you that he bought the elephant mans skeleton? that is all kinds of fucked up.

"boy, i sure do love living in a closet next to a pair of old skis."

this will look great next to the credenza

every ones all “oh his poor children, but now who will dangle them precariously over balcony ledges?” fuck. if anyone else did that child services would be on their asses like right meow.

"dont mind me, just airing out my baby"

"dont mind me, just airing out my baby"

Fuck. just. fuck. you are all phonies. its OK to admit it if you don’t give a fuck that he died, because i sure don’t. i feel bad for his family and friends yes, but they actually knew him and didn’t think he was a terrible person. people that don’t know him at all and spent the last decade mocking him do not need to be upset that he died, you are all huge phonies.

Breaking news: we're all tools

Breaking news: we're all tools

i can understand people crying and being upset when Heath Ledger or Kurt Cobain died but they were, for the most part, totally reasonable people that had a lot to offer the world. Micheal Jackson had a pet chimp named bubbles and routinely slept in a bed with several children that were not his own. do you see the difference here society? my point is yes, he died and its sad for those close to him. yes, at one point in his life he was creative and very popular and talented. if he died when it was 1989 this would be very sad. but he spent the last years of his life being a crazy as hell recluse that was in and out of court for child molestation charges. so go fuck yourself CNN.

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1 Response to “in other news, Michael Jackson died; i don’t give a shit.”


  1. 1 Aaron June 27, 2009 at 10:48 am

    man, i basically said this exact same rant the same fucking day he died.


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